I'm coming home NZ!

This time next week we will be on a plane on our way back to New Zealand. I have mixed feeling about this and it is hard to put into words. I have come to love our little rural New South Wales town as home and have really found a natural groove over here.
But... it's not where my heart is and as the saying goes 'home is where the heart is'.

We have made some amazing friends and met fabulous people here in Australia but nothing equals the tidal pull of your family. With some big family events and hard times also on the horizon the need to be near family strengthens more.

Talking with friends the other day about how they have decided to make the move back {after five year in this land of the lucky} makes you realise that even time doesn't numb the need for home.
We have had a reasonably hard year with my health and having no family or close family friends has been incredibly difficult. There have been plenty of days where I wished I could have had someone take the kids for a weekend, or cook us a meal, or come and do the housework.

There are so many things happening in New Zealand that we have missed. There are upcoming weddings, babies, graduations, Grandparents getting older, and the likes yet to come. Some days I wonder what we were thinking moving over here to do it all ourselves start a better life.
I have coped by being an emotional bottler. I don't let myself get worked up or lost in the emotion of loss and missing people. I don't write letters, emails, texts or make phone calls. I'm sure I come across cold and heartless but its a coping mechanism to keep myself from feeling the pain of reality.

I am looking forward to next Saturday, walking off that plane and seeing the people who I sometimes try to forget. I can feel the pain of having missed them in the comfort of their presence. I am looking forward to catching up on everything I have missed and slipping back in to the spot that I know they can't fill without me.

Look out New Zealand these five crazy ditch hoppers have had some sense knocked into them and are coming home!

Goody, Goody, Gumdrops icecream

Tip top ice creams

Toffeepops

Eskimo Lollies

Krispie Biscuits (plain and choc coated)

ETA chips

Krispa Chicken Corn Chips

Reduced Cream Onion Dip

Mallowpuffs

Cameo cremes (mint)

Griffins biscuits in general

Export Gold

Tui

And so much more...

{Hmmmm Round 4 12WBT is going to need to kick my bum! I do not need this food, I do not need this food!)

BUT Sydney we will see you again........

A week later!

The Farm

A few weeks ago we left our five bedroom, 3 bathroom, study and two living spaces to move to a 3 bedroom house.
Why? Because:

1. The landlords put the house on the market without us being notified until months later when first we saw it advertised and then second a for sale sign was banged out front.
2. The house was in need of some TLC and the landlords weren't prepared to come and do it. Whether they were too busy or it wasn't a priority I'm not sure but it didn't help us.
3. It was cold! Seriously it was colder inside than it was outside. Great in summer, not great in winter.
4. My health has been under some serious testing these last few months. Constant migraines and absolutely no energy are just the tip of the symptom iceberg and I just couldn't cope with up keeping a house of the size any more.

So we have down sized and country lifestyles instead. We now have a far more manageable house size and around 3 acres of land - which is so in my dream world of sheep, chickens, pigs, cows, ducks, dogs etc, etc.

I am totally smitten by peace and quite and fresh air. I said to Bubba the other day that life is just to great here to go back to city. I actually don't think I could handle it anymore. I was so made and designed for the country lifestyle. I can't wait to get our animals and gardens happening and enjoy the fruit of our hard work out here.

I have been through numerous tests and am ongoing multiple testing for my health at the moment. I have had upteen blood tests to test for everything under the sun and have started down the path of CT and MRI scans to rule out, or find, anything that is affecting my brain.

My CT came back clear which is a relief but my doctor is amazing and is doing everything he can to get to the bottom of my health concerns so that I can get back to enjoying a normal life. I am still awaiting my MRI results as I have only just been to the John Hunter hospital to have these done.

It is so nice to sit out in the sun and enjoy our new views as I try and escape what has become my normal for now. I try to do every day with as much smile and as much energy as my body will permit me as there is no point sitting around crying and feeling sorry for myself.

Most people wont even know the load I deal with daily as I'm not one to moan about my circumstances when I know there are others out there dealing with their own stuff and often much more.

The rural church that is in front of our property.

We are blessed with an abundance of fruit trees at the farm. We have oranges, lemons, limes, apple, apricots, grapes and passionfruit that I can so far identify. We are looking forward to getting our own vegetable and herb gardens up and running and enjoying the freshness of home grown.

Another biggy that I am trying out at the farm is to eliminate as many chemicals from our lives as possible. One of the reasons I am having so many tests right now is to rule out any serious illness or life threaten diseases before we move onto the path of environmental.

After doing a lot of research, thanks to a good friend over here who dealt with very similar symptoms and lack of enjoyable life, we are looking at a possibility of Multiple Chemical Sensitivity which will usually lead to Chronic Fatigue. There is a very good reason to believe that all the hype around the Paritutu Dioxin Dump in New Plymouth, New Zealand, is a little more true than the so called "government research" would say ( You can read more here and here to get a better picture). This would account for a Mutliple Chemical Sensitivity and why I never had migraines, among other symptoms, until the last three to four years when I moved into a property in this area.

We are very glad to have found somewhere that we can be chemical free and have found an amazing doctor who is open to working with an environment specialist to work through this, providing that the can't find any other medical reason for my symptoms.

So for now we will keep working on why I have the symptoms I do and hope to get to the bottom of it but we are doing everything in our power to try and eliminate the stress that my mind and body are under.
So welcome to our farm and we hope to be a little more chemical free and self sufficient everyday that we are learning more about how to go about it. 

THAT!! child

Does anyone else have that child? Is there a rule for which number child it falls on? Or if you only have one do they display that child tendencies as a role they must fill?

You all know that child I'm talking about.

The one that scuffs brand new $50 shoes in the first five minutes they are on their feet.
The one that would find the only dog poo to trod through in a 5km radius.
The one who cuts there own hair not once, not twice but three days in a row.
The one who packs up their friends and runs away from the house they are playing at to one of the others house and hides along the way so the parents can't find them.
The one that puts the cat in the shower every time they have one.
The one who rubs lipstick into the white carpet.

That child who has been told off FIVE times for doing the same thing but still looks at you blankly and says "What???" in a lost and vacant voice when you finally lose the plot.
The child who will wait until you have poured two drinks and then one for yourself, while they stand watching, you finally sit down to relax and then they ask for one!

The one who thinks fun is swinging from the new handrail and ripping it out of the wall.
That child who every time you go shopping just has to use the toilet!
Or the one who takes your friends children to the shed with them and plays with oil and petrol while you sit for a relaxing coffee with a friend.

The one who opens the door with a chair, while you are feeding the baby, and decides to walk to McDonalds.
That child that yells and screams any time the phone rings or you are out in public to make you look like the worlds flaky parent.
The one who breaks things in the first five minutes of wearing/owning/playing with.
The one who has no fear in the question they will ask total strangers - like "did your babies come out your bottom too?"

The one who pushes or hits your friends kids and then innocently denies it even when you were watching.
The one who drinks dishwashing liquid, bubble liquid, hand soap, washing powder or floor wash.
That child who eats a packet of contraceptive pills from the bedside table.

You all know that child right?

The one who makes you cry because you just don't know what to do with them anymore.
The one you attribute all your grey hairs to.
The one who makes you feel like you are failing as a parent.

Does it get better?
Do they grow out of it?
Will I forever find myself saying "Honestly! That child!!".

One day I know there will be that child stories that will be laughed over and shared.
Stories that you will tell when comforting friends over there very own that child.
Tales that will be told about you when you complain about your that child and your losing of sanity.

But for now I am in the season of life where that child does things daily, if not numerous times a day. Some days I have to laugh because I can't cry or yell anymore.
I do love that child as much as all the other but that child sure tests my ability as a Mum!

nb: not all of these scenarios are from my real life 'that child', I have taken the liberty to share other people's that child experiences so that we all feel like we are normal.

Things I'm loving

Lots of rain has meant having to find lots of inside things to do. So I was extremely happy when our consignment was delivered. Read more about this here.

Kids starting school again and their super cute uniforms. Read about Jaybugs first day of school here.

 

Spending one-on-one time with Mr Squeak - making triple choc muffins (sadly from a box as I don't have my baking supplies up to stock yet) and loving my kids Tupperware range

Very proud of himself

Picking up online bargains - Pumpkin Patch dresses that I would have never paid full price for as the prices are ridiculous but at $20 each I am happy to buy two! These are available on both NZ and AUS Pumpkin Patch online shopping sites

This is my Favourite!

Family outings again - when the rain stops we can do more of this....

Getting to catch up with good friends - Helen (from over at OneTrickPony) and her beautiful family which is about to have two new additions any week now.

So even with having the flu, lots of rain, everything is flooding, feeling homesick and Bubba having to work away from home. There is still plenty to be thankful for.

Linking in with PaisleyJade for Things I'm Loving Friday.

First Day

Today is Jaybugs first day at school.

Seeing we moved and all, it was also Quacks first day at our new local primary school on Monday.

Today we celebrate our little girl entering the school world and becoming a big girl. If we were still in New Zealand she wouldn't be starting school for another four months when she turns five in May. But here if you are turning five before the 31st of July for that year you may start school at the beginning of the school year. If you turn five after the 1st of August you have to start the following year. So a beginner at school may be four, five or six years old (as you legally don't have to begin school until 6 years old).

When we met with the principal on Friday he said that Jaybug was in the younger of the starters and we didn't have to send her if we weren't ready. I looked him in the eye and said "she is ready all right and Mum is ready for her to go." He laughed and said "right Kinda it is!"
Here in Australia they have grades - Kindergarten to year 6. So Jaybugs first year is in Kindergarten where at home she would have gone into year 0 and completed a part year before commencing year 1 at the beginning of next year. So she is what they call at Kin-da kid this year in infant school (which Quack is still apart of in year 2 here, he would have been year 3 at home but it translate to year 2 here)

I love the idea that all the children start fresh on the same day of the year. The all get to be new and nervous together - and that goes for the parents as well. It has been such a big move here but both Bubba and I know that nothing could be better for Jaybug than to start school and get her involved with other children. I am looking forward to a few grumpy dinner times and a few morning tears about putting on uniforms but I know she will be fine. Jaybug is more than ready with being able to communicate clearly and for what she wants and needs, she is able to interact with other children and she loves to be on task doing things. She is very vocal and likes lots of attention, is very stubborn, determined and tells some interesting stories - hence school teacher it is now your turn to assist me in developing this young girl into a young lady.

Jaybug today Dad and I are both so proud of you, as I know so are your other Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles and friends. You are growing up too quickly but you are doing it all at your pace. You might frustrate me at times with you stubborn streak and a little bit of attitude but I know if you put it behind your learning and our beliefs you will become a very dedicated student and a loyal friend.
We can't wait to see you grow and blossom throughout this school year and develop lots of new skills. Your big brother is there to guide you and help whenever he can, although he may not admit it in front of his new mates but he is super excited you with him in this new adventure.
We look forward to seeing you build new friendships and find out who you are and what you like to do. Your little brother will be lost without you. But its ok, Mum will look after him and try to do fun things with him like you used to. We love you lots and are always here for you. You are a star sparkling in our sky, lighting up our lives. May you always be as bright and as happy as you are today.

~:~ A daughter may outgrow your lap, but she will never outgrow your heart.  ~Author Unknown ~:~


xxx  your loving Family  xxx

P.s Your teacher just rang to say you at all your lunch at morning tea so I have just had to run over and give you some more - such a Jaybug thing to do. I just laughed and said "Only Jaybug!" Never change my precious girl, and you were still smiling and laughing too which is a good sign.

This is the kids Friday sports Uniform

Fair Aussies if I might say so myself.

The Newbies

So we arrived to Australia a few weeks ago now. Since then we have managed to see a few things and do a few things in the first week that we were here. We had hired rental cars while Mum, Kev and Mosie were here. But for the last week and a bit we have been a little more home bound as we just haven't found the perfect vehicle for us to purchase yet.

We are living in Regional NSW, just out of Muswellbrook. It is a lovely town with a school straight across the road and the main street is two blocks over.

This is our house from the front - I plan on doing a proper house blog once of shipment arrives and I have some stuff to fill the space!

We have an awesome long driveway which is perfect for bikes, scooters, skateboards etc. I was a little worried at first about the property not being fenced at the front but the kids are doing surprisingly well. Apart from one incident while minding my friends children while she was in hospital. I tell you losing your own kids is terrifying but thinking about having to make the call to let someone else know you have lost one of there's - serious meltdown material!

Our backyard is bigger than the front and is perfect for games of cricket, football and rugby. I am lucky enough to have 5 decent size bedrooms, 3 bathrooms, 2 living areas, dining room and an office (which I'm plan on claiming as my craft space). The only down side is cleaning a house this big, I think I am beginning to imagine I work in a hotel or something!

The local Public School is straight across the road. It couldn't be more handy!

Found out this morning this is Quacks classroom.

We also have a Catholic church (not that we are Catholic), an RSL, a zebra crossing, a war monument and a playground all on our street, so it's a pretty happening place.

The kids love this playground.

And then 2 streets over we are in the main street. Our main street boasts numerous cafe, an IGA, a hardware store, post office, 2 pubs, a library, a craft shop, a lawyers, an emergency department, a takeaways, a gift shop, a general store, a lottery shop, a saddlery, a vets, a second hand clothing store, a petrol station and dvd store, a pet grooming place, a hairdressers, a reality office - I know I have forgotten a few too.

Wow! Its huge for such a small place!

I love the look of this shop. I haven't let myself go in yet as I am afraid to fall in love with everything.

The town hall that now houses the hairdresser and beauty shop

A quaint looking Cafe

Not todays petrol pump - just a historic one in the street

The emergency rooms

So even being stuck here without a vehicle isn't so bad. we are pretty well serviced. The thing that isn't so fun is being the newbies. Everyone here is pretty friendly and its seems like a great place to live. It is just hard not having friends and family to call around on or to have come for coffee. As the kids start school - Quack today and Jaybug on Wednesday - I hope to meet some other Mums, over time. There is also a Monday morning library playgroup for Squeak. But all in all its pretty scary having to put yourself out there and start from scratch.
I mean what if no one actually does coffee groups here? Or people are friendly in the street, the shops or the school yard but what if it never goes beyond that? What if people don't like the kids? Or me?

It really is hard being the newbies in town but this is also a new country too. There are lots of new words and normals for us to get used to. I'm sure the kids will pick up on things a lot quicker being in school. We went to the takeaways store the other night and trying to find a hotdog was a nightmare. Bubba ended up explaining that we were new here and the lady just laughed at us and said "and? so am I?". She isn't in my list of nice people I have encountered here. Then we asked for hotdogs and her and the other lady started giggling and asked us if we meant sausage in pastry? I thought it was batter but ok we will go with pastry.
Turns out they are called Pluto Pups? Strange huh! But seriously no need to laugh at us for not knowing people.

I am worried about things that the kids may say and be laughed at for. Things like jandals, slides, water fountains, felt pens and togs all have different names here. I guess slowly people will get used to these strange Kiwi's that have hopped the ditch but for now it is a heck of a nerve wrecking time.